Sunday, January 8, 2017

Some things you just don't say!!!

So Friday 1/6/17 I go out take both girls to work, I have the car to do inspections, come back take son the work, continue doing inspections, pick up girls from work, come home, put in pictures, think I also had to cook that night!!

So the arrangement is: I go out and do inspections, he stay home and put in information on computer! Why, he doesn't like driving! 👎🏽😠 I don't complain too much because it's gets me out the house! So fine!!

This particular day, I didn't answer a question because I missed it so when he gets to it,
he asked why didn't I get the answer to this question!
I said "I must have skipped over it!
He ask "Why?"
I said I didn't see it!"
He says, "How did you not see it when it's on your phone!"
I say:"I don't know!"
Him: "What you mean you don't know, who should I ask!"

Of course the bottom line is I didn't get the answer! With some auto places we inspection somethings can be answered by observation, so not all questions need to be asked! But he wasn't satisfied with the answers given him! He keep badgering, I blew up: I threw my phone on the floor and stormed out of the bedroom into the girls room! We stood in the living room arguing and cussing at each other, while the kids watched on! At that point I threw my rings on the floor towards him! He stormed towards me but were stopped by the kids. I went and sat on the girls bed!

At this point everyone is upset, especially my youngest! So as I over hear the conversation he is having with the other two children how I'm too stupid to do the jobs! How much time he spends putting the information in, how it takes him hours and staying up all night looking for the information about the company that the insured didn't provide. So he goes on and on and on!!!

My son tells him about all that I do, driving, jobs and some times cook! My husband agreed but still beefing.

I mentioned divorced to my youngest, she said that would them in the middle, they have no where to go! I stated I would make room for them!

So going along...Went back in room, he asks what's wrong with me, I told him! When you question me like that I can't take it and I flip out: like he didn't know that! Says I need to get that fixed!!! 😱😱 okayyyy!!! There so much that needs to be said!!!!!!

He says:
Everyone is upset because of me
Why am I chasing after other people
Why do I wanna be a nobody
One day if I act like this again he will murder me!!!
Why am I looking for outside of home and he hopes it stings me in the a**
What's better than what's here
He even told my son, he wants me to leave and never come back!
Why do I want to be a weak person

One thing I do have to agree with him on is, I don't open my mouth! Communication has always been my downfall!!

I just feel so defeated, tired emotionally mentally and physically! I'm too the point of not wanting to try anymore or be with anyone! This relationship is too trying!  It's not worth it!!

Then of course he goes back as if everything is okay, he apologizes!! I don't accept!
I'm tired boss!!

I'm sure I'm forgetting some things but until then!!!

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