What's on my mind.....

A bunch of stuff. I sit and wonder what my body is going thru. One day I'm fine and next I feel like taking a handful of sleeping pills....which I keep in my bag at all times. 

There are days where I feel like I can take on the world then there are days where I just want to sit and cry all day!!! 

I looked up chronic depression and wonder if that was it but then menopause have kinda the same symptoms. Need to see the doctor. 

I find sad and scary at the same time when I am driving and wishing maybe even fantasizing someone is in the car with me, psychotic I know! We are riding and listening to music, usually have my R & B playing and my mind goes to town! Then I snap out of it thinking how sad that is! Sounds like I need a PentHouse at the psych ward! Trust me I've thought about it! 

Thought about seeing a psychiatrist! 

My mind is my worst enemy! I make up a world that don't exist! Maybe because I want it so bad!! Maybe even need it!!