Feel like a fool....

As I sit at think about how I feel...I feel like a fool-why??

•Allowing myself to be disrespected 

•Not taking the steps to try to change my financial situation

•Holding on to a fantasy 

•Not caring enough to take care of myself 

I'm to the point of giving up on everything !!...yeah again!!! 

I told my husband I wish I didn't have feelings, that way I wouldn't hurt or disrespect anyone or feel such things, he says if I didn't have any feelings then no one would get to love me, I wouldn't be what makes me me! I guess! 

Patience and endurance right??!